All videos should be this good...

Björk - All Is Full Of Love
by Bjork

Hell to the yes.

Some beef is big and some beef is small...

...but what y'all call beef is not beef at all.

I don't know if you're following the old skool versus new skool beef between Ice-T and Soulja Boy, but if not, the Beckstar provides.

The play by play goes as follows: Ice-T disses Soulja Boy on the MixTape, Soulja Boy responds with video, Ice-T answers in kind. Kanye chimes in. Enjoy:

Ice-T --> "Soulja Boy - let me talk about Soulja Boy. I know you're young enough to be my kid, but you singlehandedly killed hip hop"

Soulja Boy --> "Real talk though. Mr T. you gots to- you must understand, shit is different now. When you was born, niggas was still driving in wood cars, god-damn Walmart wasn't made yet, you know. There wasn't no internet, there wasn't no video cameras to record this, to diss your whole ass on."

Ice-T --> "If any war, it's going to be good hip hop versus bad hip hop, you understand what I'm saying? And if there has to be a war on that battlefield, then' I'm proud to be the general, nigga. And I will never shoot a round off."

BTW, I'm on team Soulja Boy. Ice-T's comments are solid, but he's about twenty years past his best-before date, and should probably stick to acting and doing whatever it is he does with the frightening Amazon he's married to. I don't really want to know.

Beckstar reviews animated gifs of dragons

So I was reminiscing on one of my most popular posts - reviews of animated gifs of cats, and was inspired to log a similar entry. This time dragons.

This was an interesting project, because it highlighted a clear lack of understanding in our culture of what exactly a dragon is. Let's start with

Dragons are:

Yes. Dragons are flying, fire-breathing badasses. If this gif included some burning villagers, it would be pretty much perfect.

Dragons are not:

Turds with faces.

Sexy alligators.

Interested in world events, sports, editorials or comics. In fact, I'm pretty sure that dragons can't read. Period.

Bats with pants.

Now that we're on the topic, can we talk about cartoons and animals in pants?

I get that illustrators don't really want to draw the creepy loin region of these asexual subjects, and thus just toss on an oversized t-shirt or a pair of tight jeans. But for the viewers, this just begs the question of what exactly lives under these garments, which is infinitely more disturbing.

This is a gyrating freak show.

Not only does the creator of this gif imagine dragons to be obese, overly friendly try-hards, but the left hand is perpetually locked in a moment of obscene self-gratification. Can you imagine if this dragon was wearing pants?

My guess is that the dragon in this case is a thinly-veiled metaphor for the creator's "Fun Uncle Touch-a-lot". Sometimes the subconscious comes out in unexpected ways.

And then we have my personal favourite. Again... WTF?

America's Next Top MILF

Where has this show been all my life?

It's called She's Got the Look, and is totally Top Model for the MILF set. What else do you need to know?

a) it's hilarious - a woman talks, in her audition, about her lifelong dream of posing with a lion styled like a siamese twin. And she's definitely not kidding.

b) it's proof that age does not equal maturity - one of the women freaks out after losing a competition and rants "I know why you won, and it's SUPERFICIAL". In a modelling competition. Brillance.

c) beyond belief MILF-iness. One of the women, when asked to share her 'darkest secret', admits that she likes younger guys... eighteen year old guys, and another says that she made her sons sign a contract never to love anyone as much as her.

d) hot, hot, hot ladies. Seriously - these women are smoking. Check it:



You can watch the whole business online on the TV Land 'She's got the Look' site, and I highly recommend that you check you at least the first episode.

Or check out the 'best moments' compilation prepared by one of my favourite bloggers - Tracie Egan.

MILFs for life!

Collaborative Low-Energy Cardboard Performance Art... and More Stuff about Cats

This went viral a while back, so you've likely seen it, but I've got to repost as it's hella funny, and really, really worth the six minutes.

It's a video entitled An Engineer's Guide to Cats, and while it is certainly that, it is also a perfect example of how engaging a low budget and an engaging personality can be.


Corporal cuddling is seriously an amazing concept

I've written before about the unique magic of cat owners, and this is a prime example.

Best Moments from the R Kelly Trial!

...But her testimony quickly turned into a play-by-play of a fantasy basketball game in which Kelly was the star player. Kelly had a hit with "I Believe I Can Fly," from the soundtrack to the animated movie "Space Jam." According to Guerrero, Kelly also believed he could play ball.

Guerrero described--and prosecutors provided photos of--a mural on the wall of a half basketball court in the lower level of the home. In it, Kelly is a Michael Jordan doppelganger, bald, shiny, muscles rippling, committing a flagrant foul against the Tasmanian Devil. Jordan himself is the referee. And the audience? A cast of Looney Tunes characters, from Elmer Fudd to Sylvester, cheering on the one-on-one game and holding signs that read "Go R. Kelly!" and "Go Taz!"

- source

Are you kidding me? This is unprecedented.

Jamison also got a few laughs out of the court, such as when Adam asked her about the possibility of the tape having been altered with special effects. Had she seen the Wayans brothers movie "Little Man"? "It looked real, didn't it?" Adam asked. "Not really," Jamison replied with some sarcasm.

- source

The Wayan Brothers defense?

Kelly's attorneys suggest that a prayer group called "Midnight Missionaries" often came to the studio in the wee hours to pray about topics such as "sin and adultery."

- source

It's a hard time to be an R Kelly fan. Don't get me wrong, it's never been all that easy to be an R Kelly fan. But the infamous urination video seems a lot less funny in the cold light of the courtroom.

I, like the rest of society it seems, have inconsistent opinions about both the criminally famous and the sexualization of children. I only need to cite some first names - Britney, Miley, Jon-Benet - to make the point. Let's be clear - sexual activity with young teenagers, as a forty-year old man, is repugnant and appropriately criminal.

But my R Kelly love has never been about reason or ethics. It's a lawless love born of ego and delusion. And thus, I follow the trial. R Kelly, you never cease to amaze.

Heroes in a Half Shell...

TURTLE POWER!

You will watch this video because:

a) you were with me when I was one toe over the line outside of the Astoria after the completely amazing Clips/Woodhands show, yelling this Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle theme line and having people call back the Turtle Power! part;

b) you've ever seen the original version;

c) you wish to finally settle the question of whether any words can sound soulful and sincere with the right delivery;

d) you deserve a mellow, turtle-powered jazz break (which, obviously, you do);

e) you are willing to indulge me in a musing on media;

Quod erat demonstrandum - you press play now.


0:54 to 1:20 will blow your mind and break your heart simultaneously

Friends, meet David Choi. He's a moderately talented aspiring singer from LA playing mainly acoustic covers of popular songs, and his own saccharine ballads. But what strikes me is that David Choi is so 2.0 it's 2.econd nature.

Witness davidchoimusic.com - re-launched recently, it includes a member's community, links to multiple networks (he has about 15,000 myspace friends) an active text blog, video blog and Twitter feed, a (currently empty) store and even a LIVE DAVID CAM. Yes, you read that right. He even accepted my friend request on Facebook within twelve minutes of sending.


Hidden Website Secret! You can softly caress David's pet hamster in real time by pressing control-shift-e repeatedly on his homepage!

I've recently the pleasure of hearing two of today's most relevant digital thought leaders speak: Chris Anderson at this year's Vidfest keynote, and Richard Edelman at our offices (full disclosure - both Vidfest and Richard Edelman are connected to my current place of employ.)

Both made speeches which included an identical statement: If you're under 25, you know this already.

The need for this sentence is interesting. It isn't necessarily generational, but the gap between those who are using the digital space and those who are learning from slideshows about it has never been more important.

Social media is so specifically about interaction, I wonder if it's possible to understand it without actually participating in it.

Long-time readers will remember that this site used to have a '10 reasons why this blog is better than your myspace page' sidebar. Then I registered an account for personal reasons. I loved it, and am now active there and on Facebook as well as peripherally on some other sites. Being open to new social networking ideas helps create smart strategies, organize life, and have a lot of fun.

But, if you're under 25, you knew that already.

Skanks!!!!

Yet another awesome comedy vid inspired by the world of social networking.

If nothing else, the popularity of vids like this is a clear indication that the social net. phenomenon has reached critical mass, and that we're all trying to figure out what it means.

Don't Copy that Floppy!

'cause it's gonna get sloppy!



1992 was amazing.

I love this line in particular:

By the time you add up all the people who are involved in creating an application, you'll end up with as many as 20 or 30 people.

iTunes by the Numbas

This little iTunes questionnaire comes to me by way of Sean Klassen via Kevin Broome, and is a cute little 'why not' meme.

This is my work iTunes library, which is fairly different from the one on my home laptop. I will repeat this exercise from home, and use it to draw over-stated conclusions about the difference between homeBeckstar and workBeckstar.

Here goes:

TOTAL LENGTH: 814 items, 2.2 days, 3.42 GB

FIRST AND LAST SONGS (BY TITLE):
-Abaixa E Pega :: Brazilian Funk Compilation [noted: the Alta Vista translator translates this as 'It Lowers and it Catches'. My hunch is that it translates more accurately to 'Drop that Booty and Get Yo' Man']
- 3030 :: Deltron

SHORTEST AND LONGEST SONGS:
- Vault Character :: Calvin Harris - 0.08
- Avalanches Mix for the BBC - 1:04:18

FIRST AND LAST ALBUMS (BY TITLE):
- The Action Packed Mentallist Brings You the Fucking Jams :: Kid 606
- 6 Feet Deep :: Gravediggaz
- (Z by Gonzales if we go by alphabet only)

FIRST AND LAST ARTIST (BY TITLE):
- Aesop Rock
- 1337 G33K B3AT
- (Zookeeper if we're going by alphabet only)

TOP FIVE MOST PLAYED SONGS:
Follow the Light :: Dungeon Family
Paper Planes :: MIA
I'm a Slave 4 U :: Britney Spears
Sweet Jane :: Cowboy Junkies
Tribulations :: LCD Soundsystem

SEARCH FOR THE FOLLOWING WORDS. HOW MANY SONGS SHOW UP?
Sex: 5
Death: 3
Love: 31
You: 76
Home: 4
Boy: 16
Girl: 55
Robot : 4
Nerd: 23

FIRST FIVE SONGS THAT COME UP IN PARTY SHUFFLE:
- Side Effects (featuring Young Jeezy) :: Mariah Carey
- Solstice :: Pit Er Pat
- Civilization Day :: Quasimodo
- The Undercover (Remix) :: Encore & G Luv
- Crazy On You :: Heart

Have I told you about my newish co-worker Kevin Broome? Yes, check him out, but please don't leave me for his articulate, interesting, insightful and amazing blog. I loved you first readers! I LOVED YOU FIRST!!!!

Betweein Kevin and the other new playa on the work scene, Leigh Peterson, the digital/interactive department is off the hizzy with talent. Makes it fun to come to work in the mornings. Awwwww...

If life was like facebook...

Idiots of Ants are a UK based comedy troupe. These particular ones are based on the premise of Facebook-style interaction in the real world. Enjoy the LOL's.





It's funny to watch, as obviously Facebook communication is stilted and strange when done in person. The hundred or so comments added since the video was uploaded four days ago are quick to crow about how it

This is great, now I can send this to my friends when they ask why I'm not on Facebook.

brilliant.. i dont understand why anyone would want the world to see what the frick they are doing...frikin hate facebook...

Great...that's why a Removed my account from Facebook lol

HA thats so funny i guess its realy like that when u think about it'

Not that YouTube comment streams are really worth serious response, but it seems rather self-evident that different modes of communication will not be transferable.

I would love to do a parody video of these parody videos with older and more accepted communication forms. I'm thinking:

• a fax party


• two people meeting on the street and talking in long form letter


• a morse code date

Older, but in a similar vein, we have the Comment Stream business meeting, which is pretty lol'sy...



... and the all-time greatest 'internet in real life' video ever - Cracked's Internet Party- what happens when google's parents go out of town

As other bloggers have said about this...

You wish, Microsoft.



Memories of this video, which I blogged about earlier, but which definitely deserves a second look. The video was pulled for a while, but it's back, and.... uh... wow.

McMarketing 2.0

You likely know David Armano's exemplary blog 'Logic + Emotion', which is most definitely a go-to site for business and user interface design and all things 2.0.

The cowboy-hatted one grates my nerves a little sometimes, mainly due to his inability to take off his cowboy hat. I know, however, that the mark of a successful brand is often the nausea due to over-exposure I feel when I think of that hat, so go David.

In any case, the graphic above is a reminder that we need to be thoughtful and insightful in generating marketing programs in the digital space, and not just throw some buzzwords in a happy meal bag.

Don't eat the gas station sushi!

Even if it is free with a fill-up.