Alanis humps Fergie...

First of all: on this post's title. Ewwwwww and sorry. I couldn't resist.

So who knew I would be writing a pro-Alanis post?

Yes, this is probably one of the twenty-seven harbingers of coming apocalypse, but seriously - can you tell me her parody of The Black Eyed Peas insipid and asinine My Humps song isn't totally amazing?


I think I just forgave her for this song.

EDIT: There is also (thanks Nikki!) a great Peaches cover of this song, called My Dumps that she was performing long before Alanis did this version. That last one is live footage from a burlesque performance for SXSW, and so it's definitely a nsfw kind of link. In an even more meta kind of move, Peaches recently did an Alanis-style cover of My Dumps, which really isn't all that funny.

Nintendo Power!

Okay, there's so much awesome Super Mario stuff happening right now that I might as well start punching bricks and waiting for the coins to come out.
Let's start with the games:

1. Super Paper Mario for the Wii comes out THIS WEEK!

Paper Mario is an incredible series - Paper Mario - Thousand Year Door for the GameCube was the best Mario game since Super Mario World.

So can the build for the wii be anything but awesome? If you answered yes - come over here and say that. I will throw a turtle at you.


Next week's voicemail message: I'm sorry, but The Beckstar can't come to the phone this month. She's too busy smoking weed and playing Paper Mario in her underwear. If this is the Medical Supply centre calling, yes I do still need that tensor bandage in size: thumb.

2. The trailer just launched for Super Mario Galaxy!!!

The Game Developers Conference happened about a month ago, so yes, I know I'm a bit slow to the game, but daaaamn.

As usual, Nintendo stole the show and showed those platforms which will not be named the real meaning of gigaflop.


Super Mario in outer space. You know, it's a good thing I adore nerds, or I'd never have sex again.

3. Shigeru Miyamoto did his first GDC keynote speech in 8 years.

Okay, so Shigeru Miyamoto is, straight up, a king among men.

Haven't heard of him? Well, this legend created what I consider the definitive A-List of video game heroes: Mario. Zelda. Donkey Kong. He's designed pretty much every game featuring these characters, as well as tons more. He's been a creative leader on basically every system/console Nintendo has put out.

If you don't know - now you know.

This man is seriously my hero. Below is the first of nine components of his fascinating keynote address at the Game Developer's Conference. Gamers - welcome to your post-graduate school.


My favourite line: "Do they have cats in Guatemala?" - that one's in part 2.

4. Koji Kondo tickles ivories

Okay, so this isn't quite as mind-altering as the last three, but Koji Kondo has basically scored all the games that Miyamoto has created, and you've got to give some respect to the man responsible for probably the most ubiquitous video game soundtrack ever.

What human born after 1970 can't hum the entire Mario theme at the drop of a wrench?

He performed a bunch of these songs at GDC, and the performance is worth watching just to see the master in action.


Midi music has never sounded so beautiful.

And besides, if it wasn't for Kondo, we wouldn't have this remarkable moment:


This guy is totally playing at my unlikely fictional future wedding