Wait... huh? Adopt a what?

Rael with his model spacecraft, spreading his message of scientific-creationism, humanitarianism and... oh yeah... orgies.

Now some of you may know of my love for Raeliens, and so will not be surprised to find a post on their latest unbelievable project.

For those of you that don't know of this pseudo-religion, Raeliens follow the message of Rael, who was a low-rent French sports journalist until a fated, life-altering event:

On the 13th of December 1973, French journalist Rael was contacted by a visitor from another planet, and asked to establish an Embassy to welcome these people back to Earth.

The extra-terrestrial human being was a little over four feet tall, had long dark hair, almond shaped eyes, olive skin, and exuded harmony and humor. Rael recently described him by saying quite simply, "If he were to walk down a street in Japan, he would not even be noticed." In other words, they look like us, and we look like them. In fact, we were created "in their image" as explained in the Bible.

Already awesome. What is missing from the message above is the way that it plays out in practice. Because the philosophy basically means exalting science and promoting hedonism, it boils down to being a futuristic sex cult in the best sense - erotic massage meetings, secret attempts at human cloning, and talk of building an alien embassy.

I went to an outstanding presentation by the Raeliens when I was at UBC. The leader of the talk wore tight white pants, and spoke the lines 'why does your God want you to believe sex is bad? Sex is goooooood', while aggressively rubbing his thighs. The woman they had on call as a 'science expert' couldn't figure out how to orient her slide on the overhead projector. It ruled.

Okay, so back to present tense. Now the Raeliens have embarked on a new project, called, no kidding, Clitoraid, which purports to restore a sense of pleasure by somehow surgically reversing female circumcision. They invite the public to 'adopt a clitoris'.

Obviously it's a given that removing/mutilating a woman's clitoris is abhorrent, evil and a crime against humanity. But wtf are the Raeliens going to do about it? How exactly does one surgically restore a clitoris anyway? How creepy is this photo of Rael with one of the success stories?



Plus, they call the facility they're building a Pleasure Hospital. Yikes. Thanks Clitoraid. Now these poor, tortured African women can get screwed again at the hands of some cro magnon dudes. Quite literally.