R. Kelly wants you to Double Up!

Best scene here? The last one, where he is crowned.

Oh, R. Kelly. Why must you be so very enigmatic and ghettofabulous?

This has been posted several times as a MySpace bulletin (yes, R. Kelly is one of my 79 dearest friends), always asking people to call him at 'The Chocolate Factory'.

Reason 9162 that he is the greatest creature in the world of entertainment.

And yes, dear listeners, I do plan to call him.

I will adopt the tobacco-voice of Selma Bouvier and the accent of a pregnant Southern teen. I will ask him to come take a tour of my Chocolate Factory. Then I will pause and say 'By which I mean my lady part'. Then I will again pause and say 'By which I mean my cooter'.

I will spend every single long distance minute of my calling plan on him. Such is the depth of my love.

Addendum: Oh, so so awesome. They have the calls actually playable from his myspace page. I am currently losing my mind. I will try to audio capture them and share them with you all.