Omigod - so awesome.

Are you f'ing kidding me? Please please please let this be true. From the Daily Mirror:

King of pop plans £300m Leprechaun Land theme park in Ireland

15 September 2006. Madcap Michael Jackson wants to build a Disneyland-style theme park in Ireland called Leprechaun Land.

The moonwalking singer would fill the huge complex with terrifying white-knuckle rides and dozens of dwarfs dressed as leprechauns.

He is planning a series of meetings with businessmen in Ireland and America to raise money for the idea. Jacko, 47, has fallen in love with Ireland since moving in to Luggala Castle in Co Wicklow three months ago and is now looking for the ideal location for his big-bucks project. A source revealed: "Michael is deadly serious about this idea. He loves the whole idea of leprechauns and the magic and myths of Ireland.

"It would cost around £300million to do. He's always wanted to open his own theme park and he thinks Ireland is the perfect place and it will have a leprechaun theme."

"Plans for the park include rides based on Irish myths and legends, traditional music and, of course, plenty of Guinness for thirsty adults."

Jacko is also plotting a music comeback and has been working on new songs in Ireland.

Music industry sources said he was in negotiations to stage a year-long run of shows in Las Vegas - his first gig since a Jackson Five reunion in New York in September 2001.

This actually happening would rule so hard - like a birthday gift from the universe to everyone. I love it when a person as extreme as MJ goes even further than his critics can anticipate. A Leprefuckingchaun theme park? If you made it up as a joke, you would get a 'forgive me, that's just too much'.

A unicorn might as well have just taken a crap on my desk - it's clearly a day of random and disturbing magical events.

On a barely related note, anyone who hasn't had the distinct pleasure of watching the classic b-movie The Adventures of a Gnome Named Gnorm had better step it up and get on it. Seriously one of the funniest films of all time. Basically the greatest bad 80's cop drama ever, with a suprise perverted gnome, and starring Anthony Michael Hall. Scenes with the police chief demanding the gnome's badge particularly rule. Don't front - you'll love it long time.